Work Together for Harmonious Custody Arrangements

Going through a divorce in Maryland can be a trying experience. You may find yourself exhausted, frustrated and overwhelmed by the financial, social and emotional toll that the process takes on you. What if you and your ex could work together, though, to sort out child custody and other agreements without all the hassle? Divorce experts provide specific strategies that can prevent driving your ex-spouse to the breaking point; in return, that person may be more likely to work together for resolution instead of fighting tooth and nail.

In any breakup, spouses will disagree. They are also likely to get angry about the divorce and may shut down all communication with their exes. In situations that involve crafting a visitation schedule and figuring out how to co-parent, silence can be a huge limiting factor. Consider the fact that spouses’ attempts to “stick it to” the other person only end up hurting the children who are caught in the middle. Instead of shutting down communication with your co-parent, try to employ strategies that will allow you to talk only when necessary. At some point, though, you are going to have to make an effort to work together with your ex.

With this in mind, experts also say that it is critical to avoid arguing about custody arrangements in front of the kids. Adults do not have the right to put their own emotions ahead of their children’s needs. Take the time to understand your anger and resentment, and make a good faith effort to simply let those emotions go. Parents who hate each other are actually making life worse for their kids. For the sake of your family, try to grit your teeth and work toward a more functional relationship with your ex.

Ultimately, an angry, high-conflict divorce does nothing to further your needs as a family. Take the time to examine your reasons for being so angry. A comprehensive divorce team that includes a qualified divorce attorney and mental health professional can help you and your ex work toward a co-parenting and visitation schedule that works well for everyone.

Source:, “Coping with divorce: 5 things that will drive any divorcee nuts!” Jackie Pilossoph, Nov. 22, 2013